5th
Various Clothing Colors Resembling Ocean Dwelling Creatures
i have been recently looking to update some of my “nicer” clothes in my closet. you know- the usual shirt, jacket and tie type stuff. now that i’m starting to slim down a bit and see some positive results after busting my ass in the gym while basically eating nothing that has ever had a heartbeat for food, i’ve decided to buy some clothes that should fit me better.
as i was browsing through some online catalog, i came across an interesting shade of color to a particular sports jacket. it was a “shrimp colored” sports coat.
apparently, they say the color of the outfit is officially called “terracotta” (like a clay flower pot or shrimp shade). clay flower pot, eh? was the color labia majora already taken?
hand on the belt and hand in pocket, check. shrimp colored jacket, tie with white pants, check. narcissistic smile, check. yep, you got yourself a douchebag.
don’t get me wrong, i’m not calling all people that wear shrimp colored clothing an asshole. in fact, given the right time and place, i might even consider wearing such a travesty of a sports jacket.
- a yacht race with my Polo Ralph Lauren model friends,
- a horse racing event like the kentucky derby or infield of the preakness,
- a croquet or cricket match where people wear sweaters around their shoulders
okay, that’s about it.
one funny story i remember a few years back- a cousin of a friend was wearing “salmon” colored pants and we were all busting on him for wearing pink pants. naturally, he was adamant on referring to them as salmon-colored (not that it made much of a difference), which technically I suppose was correct.
here’s to all the people that wear outfits resembling the color of sea dwelling fish and crustaceans! keep trusting the gorton’s fisherman to pick out your wardrobe!
anybody hungry for the red lobster?
